Sickos and Helicopter Parents

14 Apr

This has been a day full of nice surprises with Layla. I LOVE when she does something new!!

This morning I was woken up by Laylas tugs and cries (we co-sleep) but I was so sleepy that I didnt wake up until a little bit after all her fussing. finally I opened my eyes nice and wide. as I looked down at my side, I see this tiny face suddenly stop in mid cries, and smile up at me with twinkle-y eyes. It’s as if she was thinking, “Yaaay! my mommy is awake now!” It was so cute!

She smiled so much at me today it was incredible! She also started smiling when I kissed her bare belly. I think shes finally becoming more ticklish. And Im sure I am THIS close to hearing her giggle soon! I cant wait. I love seeing her smile! It makes my day.

Sometimes I just stare and stare at her. I cant explain how much I love her little face. I love her so much I dont mind wiping her spit up, or changing her poop explosions.

The other morning though I did scream, but only because I wasnt expecting to wake up next to a poop explosion. I lazily looked over to my side, and smiled at my little pumpkin. Then I patted her little butt, and thought to myself, “Time to change her diaper, Im sure its just a wet one.” When suddenly my eyes caught sight of the mustard looking stuff all over her back and on my bed spread. Im not lying.. I probably looked like this:

and then I began screaming, “OH….MY…GAWD!!!” and “GOODNESS GRACIOUS!!!” over and over.

A few minutes later as I walked out to the living room with my freshly cleaned pumpkin in tow, I saw my mom sitting at the table calmly eating her breakfast. shes used to my screams. She knows Layla either puked all over me, or pooped all over me. She tells me I should try not to scream because I might scare the baby. I know shes right but its so hard not to when youre covered in any sort of slime. But I love Layla regardless. Im usually giving her tons of kisses right after. Then she looks up and smiles at me like she thinks its all very funny.

This morning I took her grocery shopping with me. Someone asked if she was a few days old–shes actually going to be two months tomorrow. Boy, if i had a dime for every time someone tells me how fast kids grow up, “–and by the time you know it theyre 18 and youre wondering what happened!” it seems like every stranger likes to tell me that exact line. but im thankful because hearing it really does make me appreciate every single day with Layla as a baby.

As I stood in the check out lane, I noticed some confusion going on with the cashier and the little old lady in front of me. finally they got it straightened out. the little old lady in front of me laughed with the middle aged cashier telling her they made a good team. She then turned to me and said, “I always come to her lane, because Im old and i am always messing up somehow, but then she messes up worse than me and always makes me feel better!” They both let out a hearty laugh. I couldn’t help joining in their laughter and also thinking about how old people always teach us something. theres huge comfort in knowing other peoples faults. especially when they are so accepting of them. its like a breath of fresh air and a reminder that we don’t have to feel so bad for not being perfect.

anyway as I was standing there in line, a tall young guy walked in and smiled at me, then made a passing comment on how tiny my baby was. I politely smiled back. a minute later, hes at the check out stand in front of me. (wow fast shopper.) As he is leaving, he just stares and smiles at me. not at my baby, but at me. sorta weird.

I finish paying and Im walking outside when I bump into the little old lady again as she was putting her groceries in her car and making kissy faces at her little poodle dog. “What a cutie!” I said, in reference to her dog. “Oh yours too! let me see her face.” So i walked back over to her and showed her Laylas face. “OH, shes beautiful…” she said breathlessly shaking her head left and right. Then of course she told me about how they grow up too fast and become teenagers. soon after, we bid each other a good day, and as I turned to walk away my eye caught sight of that same tall young guy Id seen in the store. He was in his car just watching me. It gave me a really weird vibe. As I backed out of the parking lot and drove by his car, I could feel him staring, so I looked, and he was smiling and waved goodbye. but in a slow-motion type of way.

I drove away thinking, “Oh my god, what if hes some kind of killer or psycho?” Or who knows maybe hes just a friendly guy who thinks he looks charming when he actually looks creepy. Maybe im paranoid but small mountain towns are known to have some weird people living in them. or maybe thats just what movies make us beleive. Im just glad Layla will have a safe yard to play in when she gets older since we dont have neighbors at my parents house.

The other day I was watching the news and it made me sick to know that a six year old girl was taken by a young guy in broad daylight right out of her front yard where she was playing, and was raped in a nearby empty lot. I will NEVER leave my little girl in a yard by herself. Oh hells no. too  many sickos out there. Im even careful with friends and family since usually most rape victims say they knew their attacker. I thank God I was never in any kind of situation like that, but my mother took good care of me. she didnt even let me sleep over at friends houses, even when I whined and complained. I now want to look after my little girl the same way.

Of course in moderation. I dont want to be a helicopter parent either.

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